LOS ANGELES, CA– This morning we’d like to robustly announce the hiring of Nicholas Esposito, J. Shanks Kindlon, Robert Martinez, David Fieman and various members and nons of their “SuperPAC” company and collective as our new creative service team.
After meddling productions and mediocre successes at best, the team made it big with a crossover group sextape and album at the tailend of last quarter. With bitcoin sales on the slow rise and internet clicks for “twink bk sandy boys with surf and turf” hitting all-time highs, the bright lights of Hollywood ensnared them.
“Luckily” for us, we wrote up the first contracts. CEO J. Louis Reilly had this to say of the acquisition:
“These boys is a part of my artmy now, and ain’t no return draft.”
Join us in welcoming the gang to the Makeson Drinxon family, and stay tuned for their first Makeson Drinxon official title, “Makeson Drinxon’s Enter the Drinxon: The Makeson Drinxon Way,” coming soon.
Makeson Drinxon presents: Tequila & Brandy — The Liquor That God Intended
“When I emerged from my Holy Mother’s birth canal all those years I did ago, my life began its path toward greatness. Through trial, tribulation, intoxication and indignation, I clawed my way to the top with ain’t not one bit of help from no one.
At the ripe age of fifteen, I was already a rugged man of brooding mystery. Stumbled and taut, I once found myself sat at the end of some dusty rathole cantina south of the border, underneath two handfuls of bushy prostitute. When the barman asked me my drink in whatever foreign tongue his lips smacked in, without question or knowledge of the divine hand gently guiding my voice, I spoke:
Tequila & Brandy.
And ever since, the way has been paved. Now, as I stand above the world and look down from upon high, it is you who gets to revel in the glory of my genius. Enjoy it. Imbibe it. Bathe in it. And most importantly, buy it. It’s my two favorite liquors. Put together.”*
-J. Louis Reilly, CEO
(dictated, not written. *heavily edited)